Tao

Contemplation is my shrine, my sanctuary

Therein lies my peace, my solace and my freedom

It is in this space that I give of myself and receive

It is this that is my essential nature

And all that I have is offered

In obeisance, in worship and in sacrifice

For its flame to be eternally kindled

And I protect it

As one would protect something dear

I share it with the listeners

Or with those who ask of my thoughts

Or with those in need

And all of this happens naturally

With effortlessness and in eternal wisdom

There is no conflict

No division of myself

The giver and receiver

Are not two but one

There is no higher or lower self here

And no question of prudence

There is just this

Complete in itself

Independent of my ‘knowing’

And now it feeds me with this thought

Offers unto its own flame

Must there necessarily be a way to God

Or is it not that God is the Way?

Antecedence

As in the silence of a prayer

I sit facing a blank page

White. Clean.

Spotless. Silent.

It’s only now

When a thought enters my mind

That ink inscribes

These words on this page

And now that I understand

That what was

In the absence of thought

The presence of absolutely nothing

I wonder

What thought was that

That carved before me

The relief of your face and features

And placed at distances

Near and far

Spaces that I visit

And spaces that await me

What thought was it

That placed me

Just here, just now

In silent communion with an empty page.

Just Another Day

What happened last night?

We made an uncomfortable threesome

You, me and Fear

I’m not even sure of the name…

Was it Fear?

Or Desire?

Anger?

Or Bruised Ego?

Does it even matter?

Maybe all that matters

Was the uninvited

Uncalled for

Presence of a third

I couldn’t reach out to you

And you wouldn’t reach out to me

My helplessness dissolved into the oceans of my heart

That welled up and drowned most of my mindscape

I feel almost nothing now

Nothing…

Not helplessness

Not fear

Not anger

Not resentment

I feel naked

But am at peace with my nakedness

I feel hollow and light

Dead, unburdened and strangely alive

Which was how

Today amidst doing my daily chores

I who had died

Buried the dead.

Irony

Between indulgence and longing

Existence stands by your side

Looking at you in silent askance…

You- in stray moments- steal a glimpse

But she bewilders you

With her steady poise and calm

She’s not a temptress

Knows not how to seduce

And offers you no promise other than herself

And even as you continue to swing between

New infatuations and old remembrances

She (despite sensible reason) faithfully abides by you

And occasionally you wonder: Is it even possible…

That there actually be so exquisite a state

Untainted as it were, by memory, interaction and loss?

Indeed in and through your affairs with life

Existence patiently awaits your homecoming

Yet unveiled, like a new bride

Eyes lowered, your chosen consort

Sits unloved, unheard and unseen

As you drunkenly sing songs of heartbreak and longing.

Distance. Space. Time.

Is it a pointer of sorts

That huge, impressive structures

Should appear so minimized

When viewed from a distance?

Tall towers

That intriguingly fit

The scale of my thumb

And acres of land

Are so effortlessly contained

Within the span of my hand

Is that all one needs

…distance?

…. Space?

… time?

To see how small indeed

Are all the things

That captivate and torment

Our time and attention.

Home

image These are my conversations with silence. These are my encounters with beauty and wonder. These are my invocations of the highest in the human condition. These are my commentaries on living. This is the poetry in the prose of my everyday. These are the sacred offshoots of the mundane. Flashes of inspiration that occur in the here and the now… And underlying all of this is a quest for wisdom beyond the known.

Success Is Eternal, Infinite and Internal.

“For him in vain the envious seasons roll, who bears eternal summer in his soul”

-Oliver W Holmes.

Human failings are common. One sees them everywhere. They are easy to spot and identify. What we don’t see easily or fail to recognize, is failure garbed as success. We don’t readily know how to identify a successful human being. But above all, our greatest tragedy is that we can’t tell for ourselves our success from our failure.

What does it mean to be a successful human being? For too long now, the yardsticks used to measure or gauge success have broadly been wealth, power and fame. Trapped within these stereotypes of success our institutions, our organisations and all modern societies in general, unwittingly direct our young to this hell of success; where unknown to many, a heaven exists. Everyone is busy chasing wealth, recognition and power, in the belief that it is in the adding up of these factors, that they shall ‘experience’ success. With such a myopic vision, we’re unable to see a reality beyond these trappings. In fact these trappings give us security and a false sense of accomplishment. But if success is meant to make you immune to life’s uncertainties, why then do these ‘accomplishments’ fail us, when the tides of time change?

Very often it happens, that life which was running like a steady stream, indulging your whims and fancies suddenly one day, took you by surprise! It acted up! Circumstances that had till now seemed inert, insignificant and within your control, have now usurped control and power from you. You lie there fallen and tossed about, having been clueless about what was coming. There was no warning, nothing that your senses could perceive… And just like that, the ground was pulled from under your feet.

How does one understand such a drastic change of circumstances?  How does one make sense of things that are spiralling out of one’s control? How does one rise above surface descriptions of these circumstances?

When circumstances are in disarray from our sense of control, we immediately ‘know’ that we need to examine what’s happening to learn a valuable lesson from it all. To examine with stillness and purpose, the confounding, the senseless and the indescribable REQUIRES A HUGE LEAP OF FAITH. It is a faith that tells you that you can come to know and understand, that which baffles you now.

Reflecting upon this, is in itself, the summoning up of deep knowledge, knowledge that lies buried under a heap of false ideas. In mining this knowledge, we enter into undiscovered spaces of quietude within our beings. We learn that we’ve been working for things which we already possess in infinite measure. We seek four walls, recognition and wealth from an ever-changing world and that time can take away from us at any time, unaware that we actually live in a space of infinite possibilities within. The loss of cherished ideas and things and positions, should not be mourned for too long. One must strive to recognize that what you lost, was false anyway. Success, then must lie in something we can never lose.

Success is not a summation or an arrival. Success does not lie in what you’ve accumulated for yourself. True success is TRANSCENDENCE. When we transcend our limited self, when we consciously grow in spirit, when we make a conscious departure from our ignorance and enter into a higher awareness; and when we are able to live life in freedom and grace, unaffected by changing circumstances, bearing- as Oliver W Holmes writes- ‘an eternal summer in our souls’, we are in the truest sense successful human beings.

Losing what you accumulated is not failure. But mourning that loss, instead of celebrating it, is! Celebrating the loss of things acquired from the world is akin to a man losing his crutches and discovering that he can WALK after all! Stay alert to make that discovery! Look forward to it!

Ride on faith. Move up and discover new heights of consciousness where your happiness and success are no longer subject to what you gain or acquire, but rather exist in the freedom that lies in leaving things behind.

And Life Will Go On…

I had lived this moment

in my mind

many times-

over and over again.

I had heard you speak

(in my imagination)

words that pierced

through my heart.

And then…

there was stillness

Did I die?

Would I die?

How would I go on?

And yet today,

when what I had imagined

has followed its script

And come into being…

I find myself standing…

breathing…

I swallow it in.

I hear you

But I’m not dead

And I know that I will not die

because of what you’ve said.

I’ll live through it.

Life will prevail

over my limited imagination.

Krishna Consciousness and the Art of Upliftment

There exists in human beings the unique capacity to conceptualize an ideal. But as readily as that comes to you in a state of inspiration or ‘darshan’- where you instantly glimpse the truth; rising up to that ideal is often a challenging, trying journey. It’s almost as if numerous forces line themselves up to frustrate and defeat your noble efforts. Why should it be like that? Why do we inevitably find ourselves in a battle with circumstances, to simply reach that, which we have been made to see or understand? Why is it not so that upon understanding, I be instantly lifted from my ignorance to enlightenment?  Why must I have to wage a war against so many demons to attain that glimpse of Reality that has been made cognizable to my understanding? What are these obstacles that stand in my way?

Following the path of your understanding till you reach that ideal is your ‘Dharma’. Making a pilgrimage from the baser occupations of your life to your highest calling is your individual ‘Svadharma’. Now, having intended to follow my ‘svadharma’ why should I face so many obstacles to get there? Why should these obstacles exist? Who has put them before me?

The obstacles I face, are nothing but the hardened accumulation of my own past sins or indiscretions; the unconscious habits that have formed my character. And my character, in turn, has carved out my destiny. This destiny manifests itself in the circumstances I face today. The enemies we face on the outside were at first born within: and then nurtured and armed to destroy the very self who gave them life. But how did this happen? How did I unwittingly give rise to my own nemesis? How do I cultivate an objective view of this nemesis so as to conquer it?

The thoughts we entertain in our minds are the harbingers of the circumstances we will awake to. Thoughts that run askew and are unaligned with reality, drawn in different directions by desire, greed, insecurity, anger, fear, attachments and pride- are off the mark and are, what we identify as ‘sins’. Typically, sins agitate the mind and strip it off its repose and dignity. The way to know or see that your actions have been sinful, is to reflect upon one’s own state of mind- Are you happy, cheerful, optimistic, looking forward, or are you miserable, angry, pessimistic and hateful? Happiness in any condition- that is a state of being at peace with any circumstance is in itself, an indication of a mind attuned to a Higher Reality. On the other hand, being agitated at the slightest provocation, being thrown into despair, being fearful and angry, or constantly plotting to change circumstances so that they favour you- indicates a disarrayed mind. Such a mind lacks an ideal or a Godhead towards which thoughts ought to be directed. The first step to conquering an enemy is identifying it, then understanding it, and ultimately commanding it!

Raas Leela

Immediately install at the dark altar of your ignorance an ideal or a Godhead. Daily, light a small lamp of knowledge to dispel false ideas and glimpse on a daily basis your ideal. Let you intellect keep a watch over all layers of your personality. Let them be ordered and integrated by the sane counsel of your intellect; and let your intellect in turn, fix its attention on that ideal/ Godhead. Your thoughts must be kept under a tight watch. They must be conscious and dedicated to your ideal. Your thoughts must revolve around your ideal- like the gopis immersed in their love for Krishna dance in a spirit of surrender and devotion around Him.

Rising In Love

That we feel love- is a unanimous fact.

But how it prompts us to act and react seems to be individually determined. My state of mind determines whether I perceive love as a need, as an attachment or as pleasurable affection.

Does everything good, pleasing and gratifying indicate the presence of love and all that is painful, difficult and demanding- its absence? Why do we forge relationships out of love’s will and end them on ours? And then, why is every love story- with fiery, passionate beginnings- fated for an eventual separation, either physically or emotionally? Does a long-standing relationship indicate love’s blessing and a short-lived one its curse? And when our ‘affairs’ end, what changes mark our new beginnings? These questions that we frequently ask, indicate a need to assess our understanding of what love is and to stand enlightened about its place in our relationships.

How disintegrated and complex is the adult human heart! And in true inverse proportion how simple and effortless are the ways of children! Why is it so easy to love a child and so difficult to love an adult?

Children make no ‘conditions’ by which they shall ‘trade’ love. They don’t set out to make its laws; neither do they contemplate them; they simply follow them. And one of the most fundamental laws of love is ALIGNMENT. Children simply align themselves with their parents or environment in an unconscious bid to grow and be nourished. Adults, on the other hand, have developed a mind and the mind as such, is characterized by memories, ideas, needs, desires and attachments. Adults NEED love for other reasons-primarily for SELF-FULFILMENT. As we grow, so does our sense of lack. As adults we have unwittingly programmed ourselves to act to fulfil our ‘needs’. We’ve never really taken the time to discover our fullness. We enter into relationships to fulfil our needs, not realizing that the person we seek fulfilment from, is himself/ herself seeking fulfilment. How can someone who himself feels denied or deprived fulfil the needs of another?

To love another adult requires a constant examination and purification of one’s emotions. As adults, we feel loved when we are understood, respected, trusted, attended to, wanted and desired. Yet, if each is focussed on his/ her own demands to be met, the relationship can only end in tragedy. However, love- if we allow it to have its way- will eventually re-acquaint and align us with our own hearts.

Love’s fulfillment lies in two becoming one whole and then eventually, one whole realizing that it always was, is and will always be- All. For the individual, that love is true that fulfils the needs- not of the ego, but of the soul. Love, in the adult human mind, begins as a furtherance, an extending out of your self; and is experienced as a fuller presence. In wanting to repeat and recall the experience of that fuller presence, we embark on a journey that is more often than not, marked with rejections, trials and antagonisms. In and through those experiences, through every changing emotion, through every triumph of the spirit, we stand re-acquainted and fully aware of our essence. Love extracts out of you your full worth.

Which is why, sometimes even after a relationship has ended, your new beginning is marked- not with a sense of loss, but with a sense of gain. You sense a growth, re-discover your self-esteem, develop greater self-reliance, become more responsible, realize your faith and cultivate the ability to endure, tolerate and be patient. You plumb your depths and find within you unbelievable strength and courage. Love’s path is an upward path. Falling in love is a weakness of the human heart and rising in it- its strength. Love begins as affection and is fulfilled with realization of the Self. When you discover and realize within you- self-confidence, courage, faith, independence, tolerance and patience- then only do you gain a full awareness of love within you. Love then, ceases to be a thirst and becomes the fountainhead of every action that flows out of you.  The difference between falling-in-love and rising-in-it is that in the first condition, it begins as a ‘need to receive’  and in the second- as a ‘need to give’. Simply put, love must GROW. It must  transform from being needy to now being abundant.